What I Learned This Summer

1. Without a "to-do" list, I procrastinate.
So, I was going to link this post to Emily P. Freeman's blog like I usually do at the end of each Season, but alas, I didn't write in time even though I know Summer is over. I wrote two lists this week using apps on my cell phone; Evernote and Apple Reminders. I wanted to see which was easier to use and I think "reminders" is the winner. It automatically makes the little circles I get to mark as I complete each task. I can also use it to make shopping lists.

2. Keep at it.
When I organized and "staged" our home last Fall when we thought we were moving, I packed away items that we wouldn't need until Spring or Summer. For the life of me, I could NOT find my sandals. I had one pair and flip flops but not the rest. This went on until late July when I was cleaning out my husband's side of our walk-in closet. I spotted a white kitchen garbage sack on the floor under his shirts and guess what was inside? Yep, about four pairs of sandals. Who knows why I stashed them there instead of in a labeled box out in our garage. Speaking of our garage, that leads me to my next lesson...
Lesson Learned: Clean and purge your closet often. I love this article written by Courtney Carver (no relation.)

3. I am beginning to understand why some families have a storage unit.
In the interest of attempting to become more of a minimalist and less of a sentimental hoarder, I have been judgemental about people that have storage units. "Why would someone pay money to store things they aren't using?"Maybe, just maybe, they have a Newlywed couple living downstairs who needs to store most of their belongings, plus shower and wedding gifts, and they don't want to have it taking over their garage!
Lesson Learned: Every family has a story and goes through the changing seasons. Don't judge.

4. What? I can't hear you!
If you have a friend that smiles and nods when you're telling a story across the table and it makes you wonder if they were really listening, it could be that they have some hearing loss and they just couldn't hear what you said. I've had my hearing checked years ago but I've been getting frustrated lately that I miss some conversations. I finally made an appointment at Costco for a free hearing screening. ugh! Not sure if I'm happy that it confirmed that I definitely could benefit from hearing aids. I am NOT that old. They are NOT that cheap or covered by insurance. We'll revisit the idea sometime in the future.
Lesson Learned: Hearing aides will help but they're expensive. Boo.

6. Take advantage of opportunities!
I've been a Rachel Hollis fan for a few years. She is an author, lifestyle blogger, podcast host, and general encourager that I discovered on social media. I could almost be her Mama, but her words resonate with me. I've read her fiction books and own her first cookbook and New York Times bestseller, Girl, Wash Your Face. When I learned that she'd made a documentary movie and it was being shown one night at local theaters in early August, I bought tickets for my daughter and me.
I am SO glad we went! My Sarah was very inspired and took great notes. We definitely left feeling empowered. I've attended marriage conferences, MOPS and Southern Living@Home conventions, but the "Made For More" documentary was the first time I'd gathered with others to be inspired while watching a movie.
Lesson learned: Live conferences are the best, but any gathering of people is way more advantageous than just watching or reading something by yourself.

7. Fear and Chairs go together.
Every Tuesday morning I head to my friend's property for Bible study with friends. This Summer we read two great books. The first was Breaking the Fear Cycle by Maria Furlough and the next was In the Right Seat by Dean Curry. We had great discussions about anxiety, our fears, faith, and trust. We also became convicted to be ready for any conversations that God brings our way. I highly recommend both these books.

I am a bit stuck right now thinking about finding the right recliner for my husband that will look good in our great room. I am fearful for this chair! I am trying to procure a sofa, HIS chair, and loveseat to replace our broken leather sectional and stay in our budget.  I decided to be brave and reach out to one of my favorite bloggers, (Nesting With Grace) and ask her opinion. Brooke answered my email! She gave me the confidence to continue on my quest.
Lesson Learned: When I need the confidence to fight fear, just ask! Ask your community of friends or family, but especially ask God for help. He hears and he answers.

8. My family packed a lot into the three months of Summer:
We celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary, found out our first grandbaby will be a GIRL, cheered our boys and our oldest daughter-in-law as they participated in another Hoopfest in Spokane, moving our youngest and her fiance' from Spokane to our lower level, hosted a fabulous wedding at Gold Mountain, saw the most amazing view of Seattle on a dinner date at The Golf Club at Newcastle, had fun days nannying baby Hazel and celebrated her turning one, cookouts and celebrations with friends, I golfed for the first time in years, farmer's markets, walks around our beautiful town, a HARD visit back to Indiana to see my Mama, saw whales right next to our friend's boat, prayed for the PNW and California fires to be put out and the firefighters and families as we dealt with smokey skies for several weeks, and ended the season by celebrating my birthday over in Spokane with our middle two kiddos. Whew! I am blessed.

As you look back on your 2018 Summer, I hope the joys outweighed the sorrows and that you were able to make some memories. I'll leave you with some photos of what we packed into June, July, and August.

In His Grip and Grateful for Grace, 
xo Jane

How About You?

It's only January, but on my walk the other day I discovered a Forsythia in bloom! For all of you who live in the Midwest or on the East coast, I'm so sorry for the awful Winter weather you've been enduring. I'm flying back to Indiana next week and my fingers are crossed that the roads won't be too treacherous since I'm out of practice driving in anything but rain. Around here it's been in the 40's and we've had quite a bit of rain and some sun-breaks. Typical PNW weather.

Here's what I've been up to the last few weeks:

I attended the "Gathered" women's retreat at our church Friday night and Saturday. The teaching was on Isaiah 43,44 and 55, and everything about the talks, food, worship, fellowship fed my soul. I love learning more about God's love story for us! We also were inspired by Kelly Welk from Cider Press Lane to do what we love and allow God will use it to bless others. Check out her website here and see how their joy of hospitality has grown into a way to fight against human trafficking.

Around my town: It was like a ghost town at Safeway the other day. Where have all the shoppers gone? EVERYONE in my town has decided to check out the new Fred Meyer. As someone who doesn't deal super-well with change, I'm not in love with them closing MY Freddie's and closing Main and Vine (miss my Wednesday $5 salads!) and then opening a mega store. No more zip-in and zip-out. Now you have to pray for a parking spot and weave your cart around a billion people. Who are you? Where did you come from? 

Around my home:
How come I've gained weight since my husband has been unemployed?! Well...we now eat lunch together and it's probably more calorie-laden than I used to eat, plus at night our dinner portions are about the same size. He goes to the YMCA every day and burns lots of calories through lifting and cardio.  I take walks. Shoot. This can't go on! There are only 166 days until my daughter's wedding!

We finished season two of "The Crown" on Netflix. I won't spoil it for you, but it has definitely caused us to discuss healthy and unhealthy parenting and marriage relationships, and the Monarchy.

I grabbed what I thought was a matchbook out of my husband's bathroom drawer so I could light a candle for my bubble bath. Upon opening, I discovered not matches, but toothpicks. Is this a new thing? Now that smoking is no longer allowed in most places (thankfully!) are restaurants giving out cute toothpick packs? When trying to research, I did find an article on the history of matchbooks.

Did anyone else ever read the former online magazine called "Matchbook?" I loved their tagline; "Field Guide to a Charmed Life." I miss it! Bring it back!!!

I'm knitting again! Yay for yarn and little projects! I sent the girls of my family this blog that talked about the value of creativity and The Creator of all.

I'm back into menu planning and trying to use what we have in our freezer and pantry. Last night's Chicken Marsala was yummy, and I made One-Pot Kielbasa Pasta for a family who just had a baby. 

We've moved my husband's office upstairs to what used to be the guest room, and that is now on the lower level. We have some more projects to complete and then we're possibly going to make a stab at having an Air B and B. 

How about you? What have you been up to this month? 

In His Grip, 
xo Jane

Listening With our Hearts and Minds

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"Your ears will hear a word behind you, "This is the way, walk in it," whenever you turn to the right or to the left." Isaiah 30:21

If you drive by our house you might notice that the "for sale" sign is missing. No, it wasn't taken, and no, our house hasn't sold. As my husband puts it, we've had a "course correction." We've come to the conclusion that our idea to move wasn't meant to be. At least not right now. No doors were opening and we just weren't getting any confirmation.

Sometimes it takes some time and a journey to realize that HOME is right where you are! We had prayed, discussed, worked hard to prepare our home to sell, and truly thought we were heading in the right direction; moving East to Spokane where three of our four children currently live. During and after our fun Thanksgiving weekend there with our kids we were feeling unsettled and second-guessing our choices.  God whispered to both of us, "stay where you are, I have more for you to do in the Harbor..."

We were terribly excited at the idea of living close to our children and spending time with them often, and selling the home to become debt-free would have been excellent. Yet, the idea of saying goodbye to our beautiful community, our church, our friends, and the life that we've built over twenty years just seemed wrong. Especially since we returned here from Illinois because we missed it so much! (Here's an old post I wrote about selling our home in Glen Ellyn, IL.)

When we called our kids to explain our change of heart they were disappointed we wouldn't be coming but VERY understanding. We have the most amazing children ever! Our friends who supported us in our move decision made us feel loved with our stay decision. We certainly have and will be a slight topic around town~those crazy Carvers!

Our future is still a bit unknown since the paychecks stop in a few weeks, but my husband is whole-heartily focused on finding his next job, and we trust God with all our tomorrows. I can enjoy ALL the fun December things without quite all the anxiety; preparing for parties instead of preparing for "showings," baking, deepening friendships, and anticipating our kids coming home and enjoying a pitcher of margaritas with them! (see link above)

We aren't the only ones who turned things around! Since our brand new washing machine was delivered, every time I took our wet clothes out I wondered why they were HOT. (Our rinse cycle is always supposed to be cold water.) In a moment of "I'm not so blonde after all," I asked Mike if there was any chance the delivery man connected the water hoses incorrectly. He had! The cold and hot water hoses were hooked up wrong and needed to be corrected. For two weeks I've been shrinking our clothes. Boo. 

Lesson Learned: Good intentions don't always mean good decisions. Sometimes things need to be corrected.

We are very thankful for the graciousness of God as we move forward, right here. We trust we will flourish HERE and can plan visits often to see our precious children in Spokane and L.A.
Thor is super happy his cat condo is back where it belongs:

 In His Grip and Choosing Joy,

xo Jane

Thanks for reading SJL!

photo source: http://americanhistory.si.edu/press/fact-sheets/ruby-slippers

What I Learned This Fall: September-November 2017

Oh Alexander, I can relate!

As I write this, my Mom is celebrating her 91st Birthday!! I am thankful that she was born, thankful she met and married my amazing Daddy Vaughn, thankful that she had my two older sisters and me and thankful to have her as my Mama! She is very young-at-heart and it's hard to believe she's been on Earth for 91 years! I choose to believe that my kind qualities come from her! She was a teacher her whole life; to students and her children. She graduated from Depauw University, earned her Masters degree from Ball State and she taught at  College Wood Elementary in Carmel, Indiana from the day the school opened until she retired. She was the BEST 5th-grade teacher ever and she passed on the teaching gene to her three daughters and three of her grandchildren.

(The Story "girls" on my visit this Fall.)

Besides all the lessons I've learned from my Mom, here are some other things that I learned this fall:
1. Some people can sleep with their cats, but not me!
My one-year-old, always hungry, growing daily, red kitty wants to sleep on my pillow on top of my head or on my neck! He makes it difficult for me to breathe, let alone sleep! I can really only snuggle with him when I'm sitting on the couch.  Oh, Thor!

2. I finally figured out how to clean and shine my teapot.
For some reason, when you leave your teapot on a burner while you fry or cook, it gets coated in residue that just won't come off with dish detergent. After years of frustration, I hunted online and found that a paste of baking soda with white vinegar makes a gentle scrub that takes off the gunk and leaves the finish. Thanks, Martha! 

3. Being a "Great-Aunt" is super fun and gives me a glimpse of how amazing it will be to become a Grandma someday.
Thanks to my nieces and nephews in Indiana, I have nine Greats! I didn't get to see them all on my trip back to the Midwest this Fall, but I did get to see five of them including the two new twin baby girls. 

4. Sometimes life gets hard and things change quickly.

I thought my part-time job was always going to be "my spot."  Finding out my hours were being cut was HARD. Throughout my adult years, I have spent time as a waitress, teacher, full-time Mama, and sales clerk at the baby boutique. What's next? It's time to start hitting the pavement and find my next $pot. 

We knew my husband's job was probably going to end. (I'm proud that he hung in there as long as he did! ) When it really happened a few weeks ago, it was HARD. 

When our five-year-old front-loader washing machine stopped working and even with the new part wouldn't work, that was ANNOYING. My sweet friend let me use her home like a laundromat until our new top-loader was delivered. Thanks again Dawn!!

Deciding to sell our dream home was HARD! Not knowing if it's the right solution has us awake at night. I'll let you know what we decide... Which leads me to #5.

5. TMJ is a THING and I have it!

Headaches. Every day. All day and night. I have been trying to rule out the causes. My doctor sent me to an ENT, Ophthalmologist, MRI and guess what I found out at the Dentist this week?... I have TMJ and my pain is exactly like the picture below. I wish I had found this article months ago! I suffer from all of it. I could be the girl in this photo!

So...I'm now going to be wearing my night guard, taking Advil every four hours, and applying moist heat. (Not sure about the don't speak too much and don't bite your nails mentioned in this article.) Perhaps my stress level is through the roof?...

6. Do you want to become a minimalist? Put your house on the market!

We actually got our home "on the market" one week after we made the decision. I sped through each room, pulling items to get rid of. Some things were boxed up and are stored in our garage. Daily trips to Goodwill happened. My bible study friends got used to me schlepping in bags of "stuff" for them to look at. Two of my best friends did a walk-through and advised me what else I needed to remove to make our home look VERY uncluttered and tidy. Then, the deep cleaning began...

I really miss my family photos and "GOD is Good" artwork, but other than that, everything left "sparks joy" as in Marie Kondõ's The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing. 

If you're serious about decluttering and purging, you might want to check out a book coming out next month called The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter by Margareta Magnusson that I discovered while looking around on Amazon. Basically, the premise is "Let's not leave our cr__ for our family members to deal with." I can't believe some of the stuff I've been saving!

Perhaps I need to write a book on how this transplanted Midwest-turned-PNW-recovering-sentimental-hoarder is learning how to say goodbye to stuff?!

For those of you who have read my posts this month, I don't really have an update on my current situation. Are we selling? Moving? Finding jobs? 

I've always loved Fall, this year's Fall just hasn't been my favorite. Alexander in the book at the top had a terrible, horrible, very bad day, and I've been feeling like we've sort of had a very bad month. I DO know God knows and sees and has a plan, and so we will just continue praying for wise decisions that are God-honoring. 

I am linking up to Emily P. Freeman from Chatting at the Sky. Enjoy! 

Only 25 more days until Christmas!! Let the joyful merriment celebrating Jesus begin!

In His Grip,

xo Jane

Random Thoughts For a Rainy Monday

My boys and husband are BIG Arsenal "football" fans. Every Saturday morning, we tape the games so they can root for their favorite English Premier League team. I have my own current arsenal; it involves all the products I'm using on a daily basis to keep this "for sale" house looking clean and shiny.

I love both Method and Mrs. Meyer's cleaners, and since I was going through paper towels too quickly, I picked up some reusable Brillo wipes. Oh, Lemon Pledge too-not only to dust with, but it is great for stainless steel appliances. I must say, we've got this down since we can get ready for a showing in about 20 minutes; vacuum, counters shined, sinks wiped dry, dog and cat items hidden, lights on, soft music playing, air freshener sprayed. Yep, this is not our first house-selling rodeo.

Years ago I followed the blogger and author called "FLY Lady." She has really kept up with the times and even has a cell phone app now. "It all starts with a shiny sink." If you've never read any of her information, I highly recommend it. I might be getting a bit anal since I found myself clearing the prep counter before my husband had even had time to start eating his breakfast.

Notice the generic Day and Night Cold medicine mixed in with my arsenal of cleaners? Of course I'd get a scratchy throat and headache during a stressful time. I'm drinking lots of H20 and taking my vitamins. I blame our trip to IKEA on Veteran's Day. So many people...

Did our washing machine break last week? Of course, it did! I am SO grateful for my friend Dawn who lets me come over and use hers until our expensive part comes in so the expensive repairman can return to get it up and running.

"We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5

I am still excited about the new adventure that is ahead for us and to live in the same town as three of my kids, but I will admit that the reality is sinking in a bit and I've been a bit down. I will REALLY miss this home and my friends. But then I think back to other times and other moves and I know that God really does have a purpose. This week my bible study is focusing on Joseph and in Genesis 45:8 it says, "So it was not you who sent me here, but God."

I also reread two of my previous blog posts that described my heart as we moved. If you take the time to read them, you might understand why we trust God so much with our next step. 

(The photo at the top was from a trip to Florida. I wish God would send another visual to us right now!)

Windows and Walls

(Our family's Yellow House: 1997-2010)

Looking Back...and a Five Year Blog Anniversary
The last sentence of this post I wrote sure applies to NOW: "I try to remember not to hold on too tightly to all we've been given. Who knows what the next five years might bring?"

We know that rainy November is not the ideal time to list and sell a home, so we'd really appreciate your prayers and referrals! Time to light a candle, sip some tea, and go shine my sink!

In His Grip, 
xo Jane

Here We Go...Again!

Do you know anyone who decided to sell their home last Friday and got it ready to show in one week? Well, you do now...

Back in September, I wrote about how much we LOVE our Harbor home. We just celebrated our third anniversary of moving here from Fox Island and I really thought this was our forever home. God, however, has a different plan for us.

My husband and I have both been feeling weighed down by our debt and feeling like God was nudging us to consider a new adventure. After lots of talks and prayers, we came to the conclusion that we need to sell our "dream home" and then move across the state to Spokane.

God has been preparing us and whispering to our hearts for months. My job situation changed, Mike's might very soon, and we realized there won't be many times when three of our four grown children live in the same town. It's no coincidence that my bible study has been focusing on Abraham's trust and obedience to God's call, and every podcast I listen to talks about GOing and obeying.

Once we made our decision and shared the news with our kids, the hard work of purging, staging, and cleaning began. I'm becoming a regular at the Goodwill drop-off, my house no longer has ANY family photos (so sad) and our garage is overflowing with packed boxes.

We adore our community of friends and our Harbor town, but we are trusting that God has gone before us and will help us find a spot to rent, church to attend, friends to do life with and possibly new jobs! I will never be able to replace my sweet sisters in Christ I have here, but I will visit often and keep in touch via texting and phone calls. As I look ahead, I hope I can become involved in a MOPS group or maybe mentor some Whitworth University students, but if I've learned anything lately, it's to let God lead and then join Him.

Yesterday our photographer-friend sent us the shots he took yesterday and we're waiting for Zillow to activate our updated information. Our neighbor-friends helped my husband with a couple last minute outside chores and signs are now in the yard and down the hill. THIS IS HAPPENING!

If you know anyone who is house-hunting in the Gig Harbor, Washington area, please contact me or comment below. We plan on holding our first (and only?) Open House today from 1:00-4:00. We'll have the Seahawks game on so you won't miss a thing!

So that's whats been happening in my little corner of the world. I'm glad we got to turn our clocks back last night and get an hour more to sleep! In the last seven years, I have packed and moved five times. I'm tired! 

 “All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies.” Psalm 25:10

In His Grip,

xo Jane

(The photo at the top was looking out my kitchen window two weeks ago before all the wind blew the leaves down.)

Unexpected Pruning

My yard seems to be teaching me lots of lessons lately. It's a fact that pruning is often necessary in order to help plants thrive. Sometimes it might even seem painful and unnecessary and unexpected. 

I enjoy working in my rose garden but am not a huge fan of weeding. A couple Saturdays ago I decided it was time to devote my morning to our yard and once I began I made a lot of progress.

The perfectionist in me wanted to get EVERY WEED! After an hour in the front yard, I turned the sprinkler on our Dahlias and Black-eyed Susans, (we don't have an in-ground system at this house) and went to the back to prune the rose garden.

I lost track of time and totally forgot that I'd left the water running in the front. I immediately noticed the river of water flowing down the driveway toward our garage door, but then I saw that our tall healthy Dalhia plant was snapped in half and lying on the ground!

I accidentally KILLED MY BELOVED ORANGE DAHLIA!

Do you remember the Charlie Brown Christmas movie when the tiny pathetic decorated tree bends over under the weight of the ornaments and Charlie yells, "I've killed it! Oh, everything I touch gets ruined!"

Apparently, the thick, strong Dahlia stems weakened due to too much water.   How could I be so dumb? How could my efforts of trying to beautify our yard turn into such a disappointment?! I said naughty words and almost cried. 

Unfortunately, there wasn't anything I could do to "save it." My husband was very understanding and said to enjoy them in a vase and that they would return next Fall.

Too much of anything can be overwhelming. When my retail position I loved came to an end, my friends began offering lots of ideas about what I might do next. They shared their thoughts and words because they wanted to help, and yet I began to feel that too many voices were speaking to me and I wasn't feeling stronger. 

 I really only want to hear ONE voice. God's voice.

It might be awhile before I "hear" where God is directing me to next. My pretty orange flowers are now bringing me joy inside the house now instead of out front. 

My hope is to bring joy to something new...

"Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." Isaiah 43:19 ESV

In His Grip,
xo Jane

Even though Christmas is a few months away, watching this will bring you JOY!

Let's Not Be "Pretenders"

I love our Rose garden in the backyard. It was planted by someone who used to live here and we're so thankful. This summer, due to our extreme heat, the flowers have been flourishing.
As I pruned them the other day, I noticed something...

Sometimes, what looks good or pretty on the outside, does not have strength and stamina on the inside. Some of the roses looked SO pretty and smelled wonderful, but as I cut them and lifted them off the branch, all the petals would drop. (Picture the petals falling in "Beauty and the Beast")

How do you tell a good rose from one that is dying? Sometimes it's easy; the color is bright and vibrant. Other times the flowers can trick us and fall apart the moment someone touches them.

Have you met someone that seems really pretty until you get to know their character? Or maybe a friend seems like they have it all together, but at the first jiggle of circumstances, they tend to fall apart?

Do you know someone who pretends to be a Christian? Do they go to Church most Sundays and talk like they believe in Jesus? Or... do they really love the Lord and because of that (despite sin and failures) others can see a beautiful heart?

Colton Dixson sings a song about this...."Let Them See You."

Beautiful AND strong; a woman of "substance." That, my friends, is how I would like to be described. OK, perhaps beautiful is a stretch, but maybe attractive with a beautiful soul? I am still learning and growing and hope others can see Jesus in me.

Look around. As you see the people around you, consider if they are authentic, or just "pretenders." Don't be fooled by appearance~look within to their heart.

"The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

1Samuel 16:7

Who do others see when they look at you?

In His Grip,
xo Jane

Happy House Anniversary!

Labor Day weekend marked our third anniversary of living in our current home! Being the "name everything" person that I am, originally I named it "Cloud Nine" and then renamed it "Carver Cottage." Do you name your homes and cars?

My three teacher kids are back in the classroom, mornings are cool and darker, and Fall is in the air. (Right now smoke is in the air from the fires being battled in Cle Elum, WA. Praying for the firefighters and people who have lost their homes.)

We've had a wonderful summer here in the PNW, and even though I love Fall, I'm not quite ready to say goodbye to sunny days and riding around with my convertible top down...

My rock-star husband has continued to beautify the yard, he built a shed and is almost finished upgrading our deck railing to metal and cable. Here's how it used to look:

It is ALMOST finished...

Here are some things I LOVE about where we live:

 The view from our deck:

Beauty on my walks:

Living near the park and Civic center:

That one winter day we got snow.

Hosting fire pits:

These two seem pretty content:

 Our kids enjoy coming home to visit:

Thor is loved.

My favorite room is still our Master Bath:

We love being able to walk down to community events with friends:

Last night we celebrated the end of Summer by having our next door neighbors 

over for a Labor Day "shrimp boil!" New Tradition!

Note to self: Do not leave leftover food on the table, and the dog alone in the house while you have dessert on the deck...

"As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord."

Joshua 24:15

Choose and scatter JOY!

In His Grip,

xo Jane