Even With Scars, I Will Flourish

Why hello, friends! Yes, I know it's been three months since I wrote a blog post. I decided to pop over to my neighborhood Starbucks to write. When I'm at home I seem to get distracted. Here's my favorite distraction...Gracie!

The past couple of weeks have been rather scary and unpleasant, but the worst is behind me and I'm "on the mend." Sometime between October when I had my yearly mole check, a rainy Seattle Winter and a few sunny vacations, my fair Norwegian skin was damaged. I have had bouts of skin cancer in the past; Melanoma at age 20, a Basal cell a few years ago, and various precancer moles so I am predisposed to abnormal cells.  I get my moles checked once a year and I DO wear sunscreen when I'm on vacation but I don't apply it every day. 

I noticed an odd spot on my arm this Spring and made a Dermatologist appointment to have it biopsied. I am proud of myself for being proactive because unfortunately, it turned out to be a Melanoma. My diagnosis led to needing a wide margin removed around the area, and the sentinel lymph node removed for testing.

From the time I was diagnosed until my surgery, it was a mere two weeks. I then waited a

week to get my pathology report to find out if my Cancer had spread. I was so grateful for a good report! Now I'm in the process of healing; still wearing a sling, still having pain, and still waiting for the bandages to be removed and see my new scars. 

I heard this new worship song by the band I am They called "Scars" on the radio during the time leading up to my surgery.

"So I'm thankful for the scars

'cause without them I wouldn't 

know Your heart

And I know they'll always tell of who You are

So forever I am thankful for the scars."

Rather than focus on my ugly scars (hey, maybe I'll finally get a tattoo someday to hide them), I want to focus on God's goodness and how fortunate I am. I had SO many friends, family members and people that have never met me praying for a good outcome. What a blessing, and I felt covered in love. I will admit I had some anxious moments and sleepless nights while waiting, but I never doubted God was with me and for me. I want to take good care of myself now, and do what I can to prevent future Cancers. Which brings me to the my-one-word I chose back in January...flourish.

A few years ago my Fraternity, Chi Omega, chose flourish as their theme for both undergrads and alumni. Currently, the theme is "sisters on purpose" I love that too! 

Photo source: Sorority Sugar on Pinterest

The definition of FLOURISH resonated with me since I want to be used in my home and community to bless others. I'm adopting the bloom where I'm planted mentality. I also found a scripture verse that spoke to me.

Flourish definition:

1. To grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favorable environment.

"wild plants flourish on the banks of the lake"

synonyms:

grow, thrive, prosper, grow/do well, develop, burgeon, increase, multiply, proliferate;

2. a. to achieve success: Prosper

    b. to be in a state of activity or production

    c. to reach a height of development or influence

3. to make bold and sweeping gestures.

"The righteous flourish like the palm tree and grow like a cedar in Lebanon. They are planted in the house of the LORD; they flourish in the courts of our God. They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green, to declare that the LORD is upright; he is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in him." Psalm 92: 12-15

If you have fair skin or suspicious-looking moles or spots, please learn from me. Don't spend too much time sunbathing and get checked out! The American Cancer Society website has a lot of information. 

Although I can't do a whole lot of typical summertime activities outside right now due to having my arm in a sling and needing to stay clean and dry, I will be applying my sunscreen, wearing a hat, and seeking an umbrella chair the next time I get to travel to a beach or desert destination. Oh, and using my self-tanner...

Thanks for reading, See Jane Learn! 

In His Grip,

xo Jane

xo 

P            

Photo 
PhPho

What I Learned This Summer

1. Without a "to-do" list, I procrastinate.
So, I was going to link this post to Emily P. Freeman's blog like I usually do at the end of each Season, but alas, I didn't write in time even though I know Summer is over. I wrote two lists this week using apps on my cell phone; Evernote and Apple Reminders. I wanted to see which was easier to use and I think "reminders" is the winner. It automatically makes the little circles I get to mark as I complete each task. I can also use it to make shopping lists.

2. Keep at it.
When I organized and "staged" our home last Fall when we thought we were moving, I packed away items that we wouldn't need until Spring or Summer. For the life of me, I could NOT find my sandals. I had one pair and flip flops but not the rest. This went on until late July when I was cleaning out my husband's side of our walk-in closet. I spotted a white kitchen garbage sack on the floor under his shirts and guess what was inside? Yep, about four pairs of sandals. Who knows why I stashed them there instead of in a labeled box out in our garage. Speaking of our garage, that leads me to my next lesson...
Lesson Learned: Clean and purge your closet often. I love this article written by Courtney Carver (no relation.)

3. I am beginning to understand why some families have a storage unit.
In the interest of attempting to become more of a minimalist and less of a sentimental hoarder, I have been judgemental about people that have storage units. "Why would someone pay money to store things they aren't using?"Maybe, just maybe, they have a Newlywed couple living downstairs who needs to store most of their belongings, plus shower and wedding gifts, and they don't want to have it taking over their garage!
Lesson Learned: Every family has a story and goes through the changing seasons. Don't judge.

4. What? I can't hear you!
If you have a friend that smiles and nods when you're telling a story across the table and it makes you wonder if they were really listening, it could be that they have some hearing loss and they just couldn't hear what you said. I've had my hearing checked years ago but I've been getting frustrated lately that I miss some conversations. I finally made an appointment at Costco for a free hearing screening. ugh! Not sure if I'm happy that it confirmed that I definitely could benefit from hearing aids. I am NOT that old. They are NOT that cheap or covered by insurance. We'll revisit the idea sometime in the future.
Lesson Learned: Hearing aides will help but they're expensive. Boo.

6. Take advantage of opportunities!
I've been a Rachel Hollis fan for a few years. She is an author, lifestyle blogger, podcast host, and general encourager that I discovered on social media. I could almost be her Mama, but her words resonate with me. I've read her fiction books and own her first cookbook and New York Times bestseller, Girl, Wash Your Face. When I learned that she'd made a documentary movie and it was being shown one night at local theaters in early August, I bought tickets for my daughter and me.
I am SO glad we went! My Sarah was very inspired and took great notes. We definitely left feeling empowered. I've attended marriage conferences, MOPS and Southern Living@Home conventions, but the "Made For More" documentary was the first time I'd gathered with others to be inspired while watching a movie.
Lesson learned: Live conferences are the best, but any gathering of people is way more advantageous than just watching or reading something by yourself.

7. Fear and Chairs go together.
Every Tuesday morning I head to my friend's property for Bible study with friends. This Summer we read two great books. The first was Breaking the Fear Cycle by Maria Furlough and the next was In the Right Seat by Dean Curry. We had great discussions about anxiety, our fears, faith, and trust. We also became convicted to be ready for any conversations that God brings our way. I highly recommend both these books.

I am a bit stuck right now thinking about finding the right recliner for my husband that will look good in our great room. I am fearful for this chair! I am trying to procure a sofa, HIS chair, and loveseat to replace our broken leather sectional and stay in our budget.  I decided to be brave and reach out to one of my favorite bloggers, (Nesting With Grace) and ask her opinion. Brooke answered my email! She gave me the confidence to continue on my quest.
Lesson Learned: When I need the confidence to fight fear, just ask! Ask your community of friends or family, but especially ask God for help. He hears and he answers.

8. My family packed a lot into the three months of Summer:
We celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary, found out our first grandbaby will be a GIRL, cheered our boys and our oldest daughter-in-law as they participated in another Hoopfest in Spokane, moving our youngest and her fiance' from Spokane to our lower level, hosted a fabulous wedding at Gold Mountain, saw the most amazing view of Seattle on a dinner date at The Golf Club at Newcastle, had fun days nannying baby Hazel and celebrated her turning one, cookouts and celebrations with friends, I golfed for the first time in years, farmer's markets, walks around our beautiful town, a HARD visit back to Indiana to see my Mama, saw whales right next to our friend's boat, prayed for the PNW and California fires to be put out and the firefighters and families as we dealt with smokey skies for several weeks, and ended the season by celebrating my birthday over in Spokane with our middle two kiddos. Whew! I am blessed.

As you look back on your 2018 Summer, I hope the joys outweighed the sorrows and that you were able to make some memories. I'll leave you with some photos of what we packed into June, July, and August.

In His Grip and Grateful for Grace, 
xo Jane

Watching Numbers, Leaning Hard on God

Greetings from the Hoosier State.  I found out a week ago that my Mom had been taken to ER and admitted. Each day the report wasn't good. After praying, tossing and turning, and talking with one of my sisters, I awoke Tuesday feeling like I needed to fly back quickly. I got confirmation when I spoke with my RN niece and bible study friends. Late that night I jumped on a "Red Eye" headed East.

I swore I'd never do another overnight but my Mom being unwell in the hospital trumped my comfort and sleep...

Since Alaska Airlines doesn't start their direct flight to Indy until May, I had to do a layover which is usually Denver or Chicago but this time was a Southern city I've aways wanted to visit; Charlotte! Hanging out in the airport when my body thought it was 3:30 A.M. wasn't very fun, but I did love the white rocking chairs in the airport terminal and I got myself a "you were here" mug from Starbucks.

It's been a week of ups and downs. We watched the numbers on her oxygen machine going up, then coming down. Thankfully after several scary days, the treatment for my Mom kicked in, prayers were answered, and she began improving. She still has quite a road ahead of her but we are optimistic. Here I sit at the Indy airport, waiting for my flight back home...

Here are some observations I've made about the hospital and my former hometown over the last few days:

1. Do not send a package/present across the country and expect it to be delivered to a hospital patient's room. 
Before I knew I was jumping on a plane, I did the only thing I could think of to help besides praying; I baked my Mom her favorite cookies.

I shipped her box on Monday and the USPS email told me it had arrived Wednesday morning, about the same time I did! Well... the box was not delivered to her room Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. Friday afternoon I put on my detective hat, found a hospital volunteer who knows my Mom, and we went down to the basement mail room. Low and behold, there on a counter was my little box of cookies with no one to walk it up to the 2nd floor.

Apparently they "outsource" mail and no one is a point-person. I envisioned a sweet older person with a cheery jacket making the rounds with mail. NOT! Although my Mom is on a no-salt diet, the nurse let her have one cookie. I'll have to send one of my sisters on a search of the basement to find the card one of her grandsons sent!

2. Do not put Barb on a no-salt diet and expect her to like the food.
My Mama LOVES salt. So do I. With her current health issues, the doctors have put her on the Cardiac Diet. So many items on the limited hospital menu are off-limits for her. Sad, sad, sad. Thankfully she isn't very hungry but I wish she wasn't so used to salting ALL her food. She has shown all her nurses and doctors such kindness and she hardly complains...except about the diet.

3. In Washington State we prepare for Earthquakes and Tsunamis. In Indiana, they have Tornado Shelters in the grocery store.


Carmel prides itself on roundabouts and they might keep traffic flowing, but they've made it tricky for this out-of-town girl to find her way around when running errands! I spent most of my time hanging out in my Mom's hospital room chatting and knitting. I popped out to a few of my favorite Carmel stores while my Mom napped, had some meals out with my sisters, and a quick dinner with dear friends.
4. The hospital stairway isn't as scary as it looks.
After several days of taking the elevator, my middle sister said she always takes the stairs. I said cement stairwells seemed scary but then I just "did it" and realized I could be brave and get more steps in.



5. Planning is hard, but necessary. 
When things were getting scary a couple days ago, my Mom asked me to bring her "Funeral File" to the hospital so we could talk over some of her desires. We found notes of all her favorite scripture verses, poems, hymns and songs and thanks to my oldest niece we compiled a list. Did I want to think  about this? No! Was it a good idea? Yes.

I feel that allowing her wishes to be heard was a way of honoring her.  I am glad that it is behind us and now she's almost "out of the woods" so we can stick that file away for a long time. When God chooses to bring her home we won't have to guess... It was also a sweet time when her Pastor visited and we got to pray together.

I was excited to find a Genealogy file at my Mom's place last night and discover some new things about my Great-Grandparents, Great Uncle who lived in Tacoma and my Uncle Jim. I'm really into family history...I just sent in my Ancestry.com DNA test.

Hopefully it won't be long before my Mom's viral infection clears up so she can get released from the hospital, complete re-hab at the skilled-living Plaza, and be back at her apartment in The Barrington where all her friends are.

Mom and her 3 Story Girls a couple years ago.

I want to thank all my friends who have kept my family in your prayers and encouraged me to follow my heart and come back quickly to visit. I'm so glad I did... It's been a sweet time with my Mom, and I've gotten to visit with my sisters, nieces and nephews, and some of their kids.

Please keep "Barb" in your prayers. I love my Mama!

"The Lord would have us not have the answers, that we might find ourselves wholly submitted to him, trusting in his care, and dependent on his leading.”  Troy Simons

In His Grip,

xo Jane

Six Things I Learned in August

I love August! It's the month I was born and the weather here in the PNW is typically fabulous. I'm linking up to Chatting at the Sky, where we share new things we learned during the month. Here are six things I learned in August:

Do not give your dog a bath if you're inviting friends over that evening. That horrible wet-dog smell lingers... Even three candles doesn't mask the odor. 

The second astronaut to walk on the moon took communion and read scripture.  I was just a little girl back in 1969 when I watched the amazing walk on the moon but I don't remember hearing the words of Jesus. I read about this a few weeks ago while reading "For Your Weekend" on Emily P. Freeman's blog. I researched Buzz Aldrin to find out more about this Holy moment on the moon.

Some "45 minute make-overs" take longer... My daughter and I signed up for make-overs at the Bobbi Brown counter a couple weeks ago. We wanted to learn some tips for the upcoming wedding and try out new products. It was really fun and our artist was one of the professionals trained under Bobbi. She goes to Nordstrom's around the country. Should I be concerned?...It took her a LONG time to do me up from start to finish. I do think she made us look "wedding-ready." Hope we can recreate this look ourselves!

New math: 5 years + 10 pounds= 5 dresses. When my oldest son was getting married back in 2010, I saw a dress I liked one day, tried it on, and bought it. Boom. The End.

This time was a tad more complicated. I ended up bringing home five different dresses; one from J.C. Penney's, two from my private appointment at Nordstrom, one from Target (What?! Yes, they have a bridal department online and it was a returned dress I found in the clearance area.)

The winner was found by chance when I went to a different mall with a friend. (I'll share a pic after the big day.) The "rejects" have all been returned. They all had potential, but most of the colors washed my pale Norwegian skin color out. The plum one below was definitely the runner up.

Maroon 5's debut album was named after me! Ok, not really me, but the 2002 album is called "Songs About Jane." I just learned that while listening to Pandora last night. The muse was a former girlfriend of Adam Levine. 

Good grief, I can't even pretend it was me since I was in college the year Adam was born! Which leads me to the last thing I learned this month:

Celebrating my Birthday with family and friends is fun even if it means I'm getting older. On my actual "day" my hubby and youngest spoiled me with a Mexican fiesta on our deck. Margaritas, enchiladas, beautiful roses and perfect weather; what's not to love? 

On Friday night lots of my best girlfriends helped me celebrate at a local spot called Zogs. (It's a hidden gem on Fox Island. You walk through the Shell gas station store to get to it.) 

Each time a friend showed up I felt my heart swell bigger. I am blessed! We had an "after-party" too, with cake and bubbly. I felt totally loved and spoiled and I'm thankful to have been given another year to spend with all the people I love!

"So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12

What did you learn during the month of August?

In His Grip, 

Jane