No Room

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas like I did! I haven't spent any time on my blog in the last week due to the fact that all four of my children came home for Christmas and I've been reminded what life used to be like when they were all still little and living under our roof; lots of food being consumed, shoes by the front door, loads of laundry, wet towels. I'm not complaining though. They're the signs of life!

We've been having a wonderful time as a family. We just returned from Indianapolis where we celebrated with my Mom, sisters and all my side of the family for the first time in 14 years. Last week here in Glen Ellyn the days were spent doing the following; sleeping in, reading by the fire, finishing up shopping for presents, knitting, walking the dog in the snow, wrapping, watching sports & movies, crocheting hats, switching to Verizon, baking cookies, napping, trips to the grocery, and a day on Michigan Avenue. It was all wonderful and relaxing.

Another family did not have a fun, relaxing week leading up to Christmas. Over 2000 years ago a young couple named Mary and Joseph were forced to make a long, uncomfortable trip to Bethlehem. I got to travel in a new company car with seat warmers while I typed on my I-Pad and my children watched a DVD on their laptop. Mary and Joseph had to walk and ride a donkey while she was in her last stages of pregnancy.

We did get just a "taste" of how they felt when they were turned down at the Inn due to the crowds and shown a less-than satisfactory alternative in a noisy stable. This was our first Christmas Eve to worship the birth of Christ at our new church here in Glen Ellyn. We misjudged how packed it would be and arrived only five minutes before the service began.

We soon found out there was "no more room" in the Sanctuary, and were shown to some folding chairs in the foyer where we could "watch" the service on a pull-down screen. It would have been OK, but people were milling about, talking loudly and not realizing that we were trying to participate in a Holy celebration. I imagine the same thing happened to the young couple who were bringing our savior into the world on Christmas Eve. Mary was having contractions and trying to focus on this most Holy of moments while being surrounded by the noise and chaos of animals and for all we know oblivious people.

Just like I was a bit disappointed for my family that it wasn't what I had envisioned, Joseph probably felt he'd let Mary and the baby down. Once Jesus had arrived I bet everything faded away except the tiny miracle baby. We all need to learn to let the chaos of the world fade away, and that can only happen when we focus on the gift God gave us that December night over 2000 years ago.

"While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born,and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn." Luke 2:6,7

Hello, it's Me!

I’d been sitting at the counter missing my son T.J. and wondering when I could catch him between his college finals. Suddenly my cell phone buzzed; he was calling me! A few hours later I was up in my bedroom being an elf and wrapping a few gifts. I had decided to stay home rather than go to a newcomers meeting. My phone rang and this time it was my college daughter Allie who needed to talk over a few ideas about her student teaching next fall. (Glad I was home to take the call!)

When I look down at my cell phone caller I.D. and see one of my childrens names, I’m filled with joy.I remember another phone call from my daughter Allie. Back in June I was paying for my first pair of prescription glasses at Costco and my phone rang.(Yes, I’m "old" now and have decided there are times when the contacts need a break.) I didn’t recognize the number and I was SO surprised when I heard my daughter’s voice all the way from England! It was the first time she'd actually called me with a telephone in months!

Allie had been gone for two months, attending an amazing bible college in England called Capernwray. Her session was over and she was just about to do some traveling around Europe with new friends before heading back to the states. Thanks to technology I had been able to “talk” to her on Facebook and Skype her using a web cam. My whole day was brightened when I got to connect with her “live” and find out how she was.

I’ve been trying to call my Mom more lately. Every time I hear from one of my adult children and think about how happy it makes me, I feel compelled to bring that happiness to my own Mom. I wonder why it’s taken me this long to get in the habit of regularly touching base with her?

Parents need to connect with their children no matter how old they are. It’s been proven that just hearing your Mom’s voice can lower stress. There’s nothing like a mother/child hug; but a phone conversation is the next best thing.

My kids read a book in grade school by Judy Blume called “Are you there God? It’s me, Margaret”. Whenever I pray I feel like I’m having a good phone conversation with my Father in Heaven. I talk to God on a regular basis so I’m pretty confident that he recognizes my voice. I doubt he needs “caller I.D.” to figure out which child is touching base with Him. I'm also pretty sure He’s delighted to hear from me, plus He always is ready to have a good conversation.

“Our prayers bring us into God’s presence” Psalm 145:18

Have you talked to “your Father” lately? Does He instantly recognize your voice?

Now Back at Me

I love the Old Spice commercials with the good-looking guy who says, “Look at your man, now back at me.” If only I could get my man to like body wash, but he’s a bar of soap guy…

Saturday was Mike’s company Christmas party at a swanky hotel. We weren’t sure what to expect other than a few cocktails, a nice dinner and fun conversation. What we were not expecting was a very fun disk jockey that would get almost everyone out on the dance floor after dinner and keep most of us there a long time.

His first brilliant “move” was having all the men invite someone they loved or enjoyed spending time with come dance to one of my favorites from the past, “Always and Forever”. Starting off with a slow song was fun and gave us a bit of confidence. Next the D.J. played other well known disco-type songs and actually “taught” us all the moves to make. Just like the Old Spice guy he’d say “look at me”. “Now do what I do.” Then he’d say “Look at your dance partner, now back at me.” We had such a great time and no one was self-conscious.

I find myself thinking that Jesus can sort of be our dance D.J. He wants us to do what He does, then try it out on people around us. He knows we’ll mess up and need practice and that we’ll feel more secure watching the professional. Our Christian walk is a bit of a dance; we need lots of instruction, then we’re bold enough to share the good news and His love with others.

"God will help you be truly successful." Psalm 60:12

After all the fun I had on the dance floor, I sure would love it if Santa brought me a WII system and the “Just Dance” game!

He Loves Me!

Back in 1984 when Sally Field was awarded the Oscar, she said a memorable line in her acceptance speech. "You like me!"

How do you and I know that we’re liked or loved? Is it by the words people speak, or sometimes by actions?

This is the seventh home we’ve lived in during our 27 years of marriage. We rented two little places while we were newlyweds but we couldn’t really change anything inside them. We’ve built two homes so we were given the opportunity to choose fixtures, etc. Our other homes have been the fixer-upper kind.

In each kitchen we've attempted to make it look good and choose wisely for resale value. OK, so we shouldn’t have picked wallpaper in a couple of the houses, but at the time it was in style! Now about the back-splash tile… I have always had a love-affair with white subway tile. Every magazine page I’ve ripped out over the years always had a clean, modern country-style kitchen with white cabinets and white subway tile. My husband likes cherry cabinets and back-splash tile in “earthy” tones. Don’t they say opposites attract?

In our last home my husband and I were at a stand-off. He wanted a textured sandy-gray color; you can guess what I wanted. I finally “gave in” and said I didn’t mind his choice because I just wanted the kitchen finished! Marriage is about compromise and wives are supposed to be helpmates, so I was TRYING to be helpful. After the tile was installed the kitchen looked fine, but I never loved it and I’m sure I grumbled.

Our current home here in Illinois came with distressed white cabinets and black granite counter-tops. When we hired a contractor to install our new electric ovens Mike took me to a tile store and led me to the white subway tile. There was no real discussion; he just gave me my heart’s desire.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” 1Corinthians 13:4,5

I am selfish. There are SO many times when I am “self-seeking” and thinking of ME first instead of Mike first. Where my children are concerned I usually always think of “what do they need, how can I help”? Why don’t I always want to make my husband happy? I know marriage takes work and I am becoming more and more aware of the “work” I need to do!

How do you show your spouse you really love them? White subway tile makes me feel loved and cherished!

Letters and Laundry

I used to live near Mt. Rainier, now I often live by Mt. Laundry. This is not really something new. Throughout my grown-up life I’ve been known to not complete all the steps to doing a load of laundry. I don’t mind sorting or starting the loads, but I am queen of “fluffing” and piling.Perhaps all the fluffing is the reason some of our clothes seem to be shrinking? Why do I hate folding and putting away? I’ve tried to follow the tips such as don’t start a new load until you’ve put away what is in the dryer and keep hangers right by the dryer and hang as you take each item out of the dryer.

Despite a tiny laundry room and top-loading machines, when our house was on the market I was never behind on laundry and everything was put away. Perhaps my current procrastination has to do with the fact that now I have to go down to a corner in the basement; concrete floor, bad lighting, still top-loading machines! It’s not exactly the environment that encourages me hanging out down there for long…

Thursday had been a busy day. Worker guys were in and out, I had to run errands, the dog had to go to the vet and then be picked up later after her bath and I decided to finish the cards.

The cards… Before we left for Thanksgiving in Omaha I mailed out 100 Christmas cards. I’m not bragging and if you are reading this and didn’t receive one, please don’t be offended. We are blessed to have LOTS of wonderful friends in several states who we love to stay in touch with and I sent our cards out early since we have a new address.

It’s the first time in years that Mike decided not to write/include our annual “life’s an adventure” newsletter. Our life has been a little too much like a soap opera lately and our letter would be too long. So simple picture cards were ordered from Costco and I worked quickly to stuff, stamp and get them out the door.

I realized I wanted to send greetings to our new friends here in our new town but I was out of the Costco cards. I found some boxes of cards in the basement, copied some more pictures (yes, I’m thrilled to share my son’s wedding photo) and spent ALL afternoon finishing up the cards. After dinner I proceeded to hop on the computer and the writing bug hit me.

At bedtime I walked upstairs and saw the piles. All day I kept doing loads and dumping them on the bedroom chair telling myself I would get to it later. Later came and the desire for folding and putting away laundry still did not hit me. It’s a good thing my husband is on a trip so he didn’t have to maneuver around the piles of clothes in order to climb in bed. I finally took down Mt. Laundry on Saturday.

Staying connected to friends or folding; what would you choose?

LAUNDRY by Kat Apf
It overtakes the family room side couch.
I swear I see the sweaters waving at me,
beckoning, "Please, fold us and put us away!"
The socks declare a revolution and a few jump
into the crack between the cushions.
The jeans shiver and wrinkle
knowing they'll be thrown
back into the dryer where it's warm.
A pair of pajama bottoms are furious-
there's underwear caught
in their left leg.
I pretend to not notice any of it
and listen to the dishes instead.

Christmas Tea- Oui!

Have you ever been to an “official” Christmas Tea? This afternoon I took my daughter Sarah to a darling French Bistro called Suzettes, in Wheaton. We love having an excuse to get dressed up and we wanted to celebrate the holiday season in a special mother-daughter way. It was a bit of a splurge, but it was worth it for the priceless memory we will have. The only thing that would have made it more perfect is if Sarah’s big sister Allie and my daughter-in-law Amy had been with us.

The menu promised a three-course yummy meal; tea sandwiches followed by scones, ending with a sweets buffet. We chose the Moroccan Mint Green Tea to drink and the server stopped by with the first tray. At first I thought, really, only one little sandwich? I didn’t realize it was just the first of six different amazing types. The lesson learned during the first course was don’t jump to conclusions too quickly!

I’ll try to remember all we ate so you can pretend you were with us. We had turkey with cream cheese on cranberry bread, chicken salad with almonds & mandarin oranges, smoked salmon, hard-boiled eggs with mayo, cucumber & radishes with cream cheese on rye, and sun-dried tomato & pesto sandwiches.

The second course mini scones were very sweet cranberry and we topped them with homemade lemon curd and Devon-shire cream flown in from Britain. Did you know this rich cream is made from Devon-shire cows?

Our tea cups were kept full and we talked and talked. I think the best conversations with a loved one are quiet and face to face over a warm drink, or in the case of my husband, at a restaurant over a glass of wine…

We vowed we’d take our time like they do in Paris, and enjoy every morsel. After we finished our scones we headed for the sweets buffet and filled our little dessert plates with small Christmas cookies. I think I'll make my Christmas cookies tiny this year so I can enjoy more without feeling guilty.

Our teacups were refilled over and over. Sometimes we didn’t even have to ask! The devotional called Fill My Cup Lord, by Emilie Barnes, offers up a prayer that begins with “fill my cup Lord; I hold it up to you with outstretched hands, my heart parched and thirsty for your living water.”

The next time you’re pouring tea or coffee in your cup or mug, remember that our Lord promises to fill us up with his love and peace. Sometimes we ask for His help, sometimes He just knows we need it. “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.” Psalm 23:5 Once filled full we are refreshed and then can spill His love out to others.

I hope you can find a Christmas Tea near your hometown. Sarah and I already know we want to make this a yearly tradition and next December we’ll ask for the table near the fireplace.

May your cup overflow!

The Fire is So Delightful

I am not cold! My adorable husband agreed to have not one, but two gas fireplaces installed in our “new” home. They are BEAUTIFUL and WARM!!

In our yellow house in the Harbor we had two gas fireplaces but only the one in the living room (where we never spent much time) put out heat. Our builder who shall remain nameless went cheap-o on the family room unit and it was really just for ambiance. I still turned it on a lot. Looking at the flames sort of convinced me I was warm.

Mike was excited to have wood-burning fireplaces when we first moved in because he is a former Boy Scout. He even camped in Europe with a General who later became Secretary of State. I however, am not a camper and am not a fan of wood-burning fires indoors due to the mess, the stale odor the next day, and my mild asthma.

Twice my sweet man tried to light a fire in the basement and twice the entire downstairs filled with smoke. He asked advice of his Dad (an expert on all things related to fires) and even that didn’t help. The second “smoke incident” was SO bad we called the Glen Ellyn fire department. Their helpful advice was not to burn any more fires until we called a chimney sweep. This seemed annoying since it supposedly was cleaned as part of our closing agreement.

So, that is how I came to be the happy, cozy owner of two new fireplaces. But wait… that’s not all! The installation revealed an interesting answer to our smoke issues. The nice worker guy (who reminded me of Bert from Mary Poppins) informed me that someone had deliberately glued a thick piece of cardboard under the chimney cap. There was no way that the damper would work since it was blocked. He took pictures of the evidence and documented it so wish us luck in getting someone to fess up.

Right now I’m sitting on my comfy couch looking at my pretty (and pricey) new fireplace and my four children's beautiful Christmas stockings hanging there. My mommy hand-knit each child a personalized stocking when they were born-check out how pretty they are in the photo!

The thing I appreciate is how the pilot light stays on so with a flip of the switch, or remote, it bursts into flame. Isn’t that how we should all be? If our little Jesus “light” is always burning properly then it just takes a prayer or nudge from the Holy Spirit to help us shine brightly and to be “on fire” for the Lord.

I can't believe the former owner added the cardboard to prevent the cold air from whipping into the downstairs. What's up with the inept house inspector for not catching it? Then again,I suppose I am grateful to them both since I might not have convinced Mike we needed to convert to gas if the smoke hadn’t happened!

So it all turns out just fine…

Merry December

It is December 1st and it is time to be merry! I love Christmastime, and the fact that the first snowfall of the winter came this morning made me think "it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!"

The dictionary defines merry as an adjective that means to show cheerfulness, delight, enjoyment, and to move quickly. With all the beautiful decorations, peppy music, hurrying shoppers and joyful gatherings it is easy to see why the word “merry” was put in front of the word “Christmas”. I also like how the British say "happy" Christmas. It is a happy time for most people.

As I was listening to Christmas carols last night (really listening to the lyrics) I was struck by how much they tell the story of the gift God gave humanity. As a child growing up I knew the tunes and the words, but never spent any time contemplating what the lyrics meant because I didn't really know who I was singing about. There are a lot of people who celebrate Christmas for the fun holiday it has become and they focus only on all the gift-buying and gatherings.

Friends used to ask me if I was “ready” for Christmas. I assumed they meant have I; shopped, wrapped, sent my cards, baked cookies, bought my party outfit, decorated the tree and house, etc. I always answered that “yes, I am ready for Christmas in my heart, just not quite in my home”.

This is the first Christmas in thirteen years that I’m not in my yellow house in the Harbor. I’ve been finding places in our new home to put our decorations (the ones that didn’t break in the move). We used to cut down our tree the weekend after Thanksgiving but this year we were driving home from Omaha. Now my man Mike has taken off for a much-deserved golf getaway/business trip so I don’t get a Christmas tree (from a lot) until he returns next week… I'm not feeling very merry or happy about having to wait but I will try to be patient.

I have a sparkly Be Merry sign that I've put on my mantle. If I’m getting a little overwhelmed or melancholy this month I can look at it and be reminded that I need to not only be merry but I can feel merry thanks to a tiny baby in the manger who is the reason for the season.

"I bring you good news of great joy for everyone!" Luke 2:10